


He Loved You

by TaeFansick



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Character Death, Friendship, Heartbreak, M/M, Oneshot, Onesided, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-10-20 17:43:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20679368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaeFansick/pseuds/TaeFansick
Summary: Originally posted on FFNMature to be safeJean decides to keep Marco's secret and look after Armin.





	He Loved You

"Hey, Jean...?"

Jean gave a lazy gaze to Marco- the only person that Jean would ever willingly call his friend at this stupid trainee camp. "Yeah? What is it?"

Currently, the freckled male was seated on the edge of his bunk, opting to sit across from Jean since the more serious of the two was busy polishing his shoes. His eyes darted across the floor, a light pink hue on his cheeks. "How did... um... How did you know that you... liked Mikasa? Like... really liked her?"

Jean blushed at the mention of his fixation's name. Clearing his throat, he refused to be embarrassed. "I don't know... Something clicked and I just knew right away. I'm pretty sure it's that way with most people," he answered honestly. It may not have been the best answer, but it was the best that he could supply.

Marco frowned a bit. "I see..."

Jean rose a brow. The other was usually so optimistic... What had him so down? "Why do you ask?"

Marco shrugged and picked at the fabric of his blanket. "I just... Lately, I've been feeling really strange around one of the other trainees, but... I wasn't sure if it was love or..." He trailed off, his face turning red.

Jean smirked. So that was all? "Oh? Is it Sasha? Or Krista?"

Marco laughed nervously. "No, not exactly... It's kinda a strange situation, really..."

Jean's eyes widened. "Don't tell me it's Annie!?" Picturing that bitter ice queen with sweet Marco... Jean might be sick at the sight!

Marco busted out into stitches. "Oh, heavens no!" He declared.

Jean sighed in relief while Marco tried to calm his laughter. He gave a small smile at Marco's lifted mood. Once he was sure the other could breathe, he prodded the subject again. "Well? Who is it then? Not Mikasa?" Though he doubted that Marco would ever be interested in the same girl as he, Jean couldn't help but worry a little bit.

Marco looked away, smiling shyly. "It's stupid," he replied. "You'll just laugh,"

"No, I won't. Just tell me! Maybe I can help you win her over," He smiled broadly at his one true friend. He would really do anything to keep that smile on Marco's face.

Marco's smile widened, but he kept his eyes downcast. "It's... Armin," he admitted quietly.

Jean's eyes widened again and his smile fell as a shock overtook him. "A-... Armin?! Armin Arlert?! That blonde that's friends with Jeager?!" When Marco nodded, clearly embarrassed, Jean's eyes fluttered in dismay as he tried to process the new information. Taking a moment to calm down, he finally opted to proceed with caution. "H-how do you know?"

"Well... I don't," Marco clarified, rubbing the back of his neck. "But every time I see him I get goofy. He's so serious and self-conscience I just get the urge to make him laugh or hug him or something," He spared a glance at Jean, looking almost ashamed. "Weird, isn't it?"

Jean gave an encouraging smile, having long abandoned his shoe-polishing. "No, I mean... It is a little weird. But if that's what you want, then I say go for it,"

"But how do I know if I love him?"

Jean hummed in thought, trying to think back to when he first saw Mikasa. "Well... How do you feel when you're around him or think about him?"

"Well... When I first saw him, I thought he looked... cute. Like a kid, ya know? But he had that fearful scowl... Like he was so determined to prove himself or something. It made me want to get to know him. And when I tried talking to him for the first time..." Marco smiled stupidly. "I thought he had the cutest voice! And that small smile he gave... I loved it, but it seemed so forced. Now, whenever I see him I try to make him laugh. Nothing works, though..."

Jean's gaze softened as he listened. It was actually kind of endearing to hear the way Marco talked about Armin. He wondered vaguely if that's how he sounded to Marco when talking about Mikasa. "And when you're around him or think about him? Do you get sweaty palms and feel like you can't ever say or do the right thing? Do you find that you want to see him looking at you when you're training or have done something impressive?" Marco nodded, looking hesitant. "What about stumbling over words? Blushing a lot or craving his attention? Wanting to touch him in some way?" When Marco nodded again, smiling with red staining his cheeks, Jean chuckled. "Sounds like love to me. Are you going to tell him?"

Marco shrugged. "I... I don't know... I mean, I haven't really managed to catch his attention yet. Maybe he doesn't like me..."

Jean sighed and moved to sit beside his friend, slinging an arm over his shoulder. "Look, you shouldn't worry about that. Maybe he hasn't had the time to really get to know you yet. He's usually pretty preoccupied between Jeager and training,"

"You think so?" The hopeful tone in Marco's voice made Jean's chest nearly lurched as his heart went out to his friend and his plight.

"Sure. You're a great guy, Marco. Funny and optimistic... I'm sure Armin will fall for you in no time! Just keep at it,"

Marco beamed at Jean. "I hope so!" He proclaimed with that heartwarming smile of his.

That was all a long time ago.

Marco hadn't given up on Armin but once they all graduated and were put into different squads, Jean was sad to see that Marco's chances of getting Armin's attention dropped to the negatives.

And as he looked down at Marco's dead body, he felt his heart shatter. Not just because he lost his friend, but because Marco never lived his dream of having Armin by his side.

Jean felt his eyes glaze over with unshed tears as his mind raced. Marco had been robbed of all of his dreams: confessing his love, sharing a first kiss with the small blonde... Jean would never see his dear friend hold his love to his side. He would never see Armin smile at Marco the way the freckled male always wished he would. Jean would never see his friend live happily ever after with the loyal blonde at his side.

The next time he saw Armin, he nearly cried. He was still torn in half inside because he didn't know what to say. Should he tell Armin Marco's secret? Marco's desire to be with him? Or should he stay quiet?

When he told Armin that Marco had passed, the small blonde looked devastated. It made Jean wonder for a moment if Armin did indeed feel something for their fallen comrade. He had quickly brushed it off, however. Of course, Armin was sad. The blonde was sad at the idea of anyone dying. He decided to keep Marco's secret.

Things didn't get any easier. Jean had soon joined the Survey Corps to take down as many Titans as he could to try and avenge his fallen friend. Not to mention try and keep Armin from harm's way. He may not be able to tell Armin Marco's secret, but Jean still felt that Marco would want him to keep the blonde safe.

He nearly had a heart attack when Armin became injured and volunteered to stay behind. He was overwhelmed when Krista showed up out of nowhere with their missing horses. Jean said she was a goddess for saving them, but deep down he was convinced that Marco was the one that made sure they were able to get back to the group safely.

Later on when they were ordered to keep the Titan's from the forest, Jean became nervous. He decided to do what Marco would have done: try and lift the mood, so the blonde would relax a little.

He was disappointed when Armin remained serious as ever. Honestly, Jean wasn't sure if he was that bad at humour or if Armin was always like that. He found himself suddenly understanding why Marco got nowhere with the blonde. It was frustrating!

After the excitement concerning the Female Titan died down, Jean found some time to go and see Armin. The blonde had clung to Jeager's side as soon as possible, so he found that he had to wait until Armin was in the library alone to really talk. Not about anything in particular, but to see how the other was coping.

He found Armin sitting alone with several piles of books surrounding him. Smiling, Jean strode over. "Hey, Armin,"

Armin's gaze shot up and he gave a friendly smile. "Jean," The two had gotten to know each other better, but there was still some tension due to Jean and Eren's rivalry with one another.

Jean moved to sit close to the smaller male, a pile of books being the only thing separating them. "I just wanted to see how you were holding up,"

Armin shrugged. "Fine, I suppose. I'm glad the Titans seemed to have lost as much interest," He fidgeted a moment before peeking past his bangs at Jean. "And you? I mean... How are you dealing with..." He trailed off but Jean knew what he meant.

He gave a forced smile. "Ah... Marco wouldn't want me to mope. He'd just do or say something to try and make me laugh or tell me to get over it,"

Armin smiled. "Yeah, he was a great guy,"

Jean perked at that. "You two had a chance to talk?"

Armin nodded. "Not as much as I hoped but... He was always very nice. He always tried to lift the mood and such. I spent a lot of time with him repairing and polishing the 3D gear," He gave a small laugh. "Really, I can spot his gear a mile away! I memorized every detail of it,"

Jean's heart skipped a beat. After so much time of keeping this secret... could it be? "Oh? So you became friends?"

Armin sighed. "I like to think so but... really, I think he was just being polite. It's just how he was," Jean could hear the disappointment in Armin's voice and nearly grinned.

"No!" He shouted suddenly, making Armin jump. He quickly moved to Armin, grabbing the blonde by the shoulders and forcing Armin to look him in the eye. "He wasn't just being nice! He really liked you!"

Armin's cheeks turned pink. "H-he did?"

Jean smiled like a fool. "Yes! I wanted to tell you but I thought you'd reject it," His tongue felt like it swelled as he tried to find the words to say. "Marco... He wanted you happy. All the time, he wanted to see you smile. He would tell me all the time how worried he was about you and how he liked you,"

Armin's brow furrowed in confusion. "He... really liked me? He didn't just think I was a pest?"

"Of course not!"

Armin beamed. "Thank goodness..." Jean was going to speak again, but Armin continued without missing a beat. "I had always wanted to be friends with him,"

Jean's smile fell a bit. Friends... He let go of Armin, trying not to scream in horror. Friends. Of course, Armin meant friends.

"Jean?"

Jean gave a weak smile. "Yeah... He... He, uh... He loved having you as a friend," He ripped his gaze away and stood. "I should get back to see if I'm needed for anything. I'll see you later, Armin," He left, not sparing a glance behind him as he tried to hold back the tears threatening to fall.

Perhaps Marco died of a broken heart long before the Titans got to him...


End file.
